Psalm 13

     I don't think I've ever shared any of my personal favorites when it comes to Bible verses. Here is my absolute favorite Psalm. I remember memorizing it for a contest at youth group. The pastor challenged the youth to memorize an entire chapter of the Bible -- pointing specifically to the Psalms. I was one of only five people out of the fifty to seventy-five member youth group who took on the challenge (I wish I could say I participated out of noble motives, but the pastor had promised food as a reward). I chose this Psalm because it seemed an appropriate length -- not too short and not too long.

     I think it was four years (or so) later that this Psalm really began to impact my life. I had been going through some dark spiritual struggles. Everything in the world seemed stacked against me; people I trusted were betraying me; I felt trapped by life. What made it worse? Whenever I prayed, it felt like God wasn't listening to me. I remember crying out and feeling like there was no point to praying other than God commanding it. But, I remembered this Psalm:

Psalm 13

¹ How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever?

How long will You hide Your face from me?

² How long shall I take counsel in my soul,

Having sorrow in my heart all the day?

How long will my enemy be exalted over me?

  

³ Consider and answer me, O Lord my God;
Enlighten my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death,
⁴ And my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,”
And my adversaries will rejoice when I am shaken.

⁵ But I have trusted in Your lovingkindness;

My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation.

⁶ I will sing to the Lord,

Because He has dealt bountifully with me.

     No matter how dark and attacked I felt, I knew God was faithful. I didn't FEEL it emotionally, but I KNEW it technically. Coupling this knowledge with the facts that God cannot lie, and God cannot forsake His children meant that God saw my pain and was with me the whole time. It certainly didn't feel like that was what was going on, but I knew God was putting me in that position for a reason. My job was to simply trust that God was (and is) bigger and smarter than me and to trust that He knew what was best for me.

     Now, several years later, I can look back and see how that was a period of growth for me. I would not be the woman I am now if it was not for that time of testing. I learned how to trust God no matter what my emotions are telling me. I learned how to pray -- and I mean really pray! -- to God about what is going on around me. I also learned how to have a personal devotion with God -- up until that point I had never spent time reading the Bible for myself. These are priceless traits that God taught me through those bleak times.

     May this be an encouragement to you in your dark hours. There are many other Psalms like this and many more that have completely different feels and purposes. What's your favorite Psalm? Share it in the comments below!

"In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit."

     "In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit."

     These are some of the most famous words in literature geek-dom. The opening lines to The Hobbit are well-loved and well-remembered. However, does anyone know how this phrase came into existence? I was talking with my English Professor and he gave me the story:

     Tolkien was a professor at Pembroke College. One afternoon, while he was grading papers, a random line popped into his head, and he scribbled it at the top of one of the papers he was grading: "In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit." Tolkien did not know what a hobbit was. He did not know why the hobbit was living in the ground. He simply thought the line sounded interesting and wrote it down. It was sometime later that Tolkien sat down to create a story around this mysterious creature living in the ground.

     What does this mean? I remember my professor telling me this story, and, as he spoke, I began wondering if I could apply this to my life. Sometimes random stuff floats around and somehow bumps into us. Other times, we find ourselves doing things, and we don't quite know why. Some people have a particular inclination or desire that has been verily born into them, but they don't know for what reason or for what purpose. Once in a while a sudden urge or idea will come upon us, and we will have no idea from whence it came or how we're supposed to react. It can often feel as though life is just a bunch of strange incidents, feelings and oddities -- none of which make sense. Sometimes we feel lost in a great big world of storms and raging winds; not knowing if we are to remain grounded during the storm or if we are to allow ourselves to be taken by the currents. Sometimes we feel like failures doing nothing original, having no ideas of our own, seeming to have no talents or skills to offer the world.

    BUT... the world is much bigger than it at first may seem. This is not something that should strike fear into the heart of any Christian, for, if the world is so large is not our GOD larger still? God is the one who created us. He is the one who knew before the foundations of the earth were laid what your name was going to be. What your favorite color was going to be. What you'd enjoy, hate, love, loathe. He designed you with an intricate purpose. AND since He knew everything you would think and do before you were born, He has decided to use everything you have gone through and everything you think you're unworthy of accomplishing to enhance His glory and His kingdom AND to draw you into a closer relationship with Him.

    That's a pretty big God.

     What makes life difficult is understanding conceptually how big and powerful God is but not TRULY living this belief through every fiber of our being. This was a huge struggle that I had battled for years. What made it impossible for me to truly understand was my belief that I had gone through so much and done so many things that if I couldn't conceive of an alternative, an alternative couldn't exist. This is a plague for many who are intellectually or experiencially gifted. I can look back now and see how silly this belief was: me, a tiny human being, who though that I could understand the depths of God and complain that His actions were either unfair or unreasonable. I fell for the deception: "it cannot get any better than this" -- especially concerning my relationships. Since I could not conceive of any man being as good or better than the guy I was looking at, a better guy could not exist. I had been so many places and seen so many people, I thought I knew best.

     I was wrong.

     But God in His mercy uses everything for His glory if we are willing to obey Him. Some things don't make any sense. Sometimes we feel like shaking our fists at God, wondering why He has decided to put us in these circumstances. BUT God is so much bigger than anything we can imagine! And just because we may not receive full understanding in this life does not mean we will not receive full understanding in the presence of God in heaven.

     I am aware that this doesn't always make us "feel" better in the midst of our hardships and shortcomings. But day by day, minute by minute, moment by moment, this is something we can take comfort in: God is bigger and smarter than us.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. -- Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

     If this is a struggle for you, the best advice I can give is that this is a moment by moment battle. Any time you feel the weight of hopelessness or uselessness crushing upon you, pray. Carry a pocket Bible with you and read it whenever the wave hits you. Again, this is a moment by moment struggle. At 7:39AM you can be sitting on top of the world, but at 7:41AM you can be so deep in the depths of despair there seems to be no light at all. TAKE COURAGE! No matter what your feelings are, God remains true. Prayers and Scripture readings will help you align yourself with Him, and in the end, isn't that the whole goal?

A Quiet Moment

There comes a time when we all need to sit down an be quiet. Humanity is always wondering where God is, when all we really need to do is close our mouths and listen.

"Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; When he closes his lips, he is considered prudent." Proverbs 17:28

Earth is full of so many people that just endlessly babble! Through Twitter, Facebook and MySpace. Even in person, there are those people that could talk to a wall for hours without ever running out of things to say. Why is it so hard for us to be silent?

It is because humans need to feel as though they are something. The louder a noise we make, the more attention we get, and the more of a "someone" we feel. If we really have a grounding in Jesus Christ, that He died for us, has given us new life, identity and purpose, we have no need to draw attention to ourselves to make us "feel like someone". We are SOMEONE in Jesus Christ.

So I encourage you, enjoy the quiet moments. It is in these moments that we hear God the loudest.