Hymns - "After All That I've Done"

     I have (rather recently) been taken with old Church hymns. Not so much for the actual music -- I'm a rock-and-roll-girl through and through -- but I have come to appreciate the wonderful theological value that hymns hold. They are starting to become little treasure chests of hope and truth -- would that our songs today were to speak in such sound terms. *Please don't stone me!* But I don't care too much for modern Christian Contemporary music. If other people like that music WONDERFUL, but it really isn't for me.

     Now, before everyone grabs pitchforks and torches, let me continue with my respect to old hymns -- and I mean OLD! This hymn really struck a chord with me -- no pun intended! Paul's famous cry, "I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate," (Romans 7:15 NASB) sadly rings very true with me. I become so aggravated with myself for knowing the right thing to do, and yet choosing the very thing I despise. This is John Wesley's hymn: "After all that I have done." (For ease of reading, I have provided modern English where necessary):

1 After all that I have done,

Saviour, art thou [are you] pacified?

Whither shall my vileness run?
[Where will my evil-ness go?]

Hide me, earth, the sinner hide!

Let me sink into the dust,

Full of holy shame, adore!
[I am full of repentance and want to praise God!]

Jesus Christ, the good, the just,

Bids [Tells] me go, and sin no more.

2 O confirm the gracious word,

Jesus, Son of God and man!

Let me never grieve thee, Lord,
[Let me never disappoint you, Lord]

Never turn to sin again:

Till my all in all thou art,
[Until the time when my everything is in You]

Till thou bring thy nature in,
[Until You place Your perfect nature in me]

Keep this feeble, trembling heart,

Save me, save me, Lord, from sin!

     This hymn was written sometime during the 18th Century, but the cry is so relevant to today. The speaker -- the sinner -- acknowledges how sinful he is and how much in awe he is of the salvation of Christ. He expresses the desire to please God with all his actions, but he also cries in fear for his "feeble, trembling heart."

     It is my deepest desire to bring glory to God, but it seems my humanity is always getting in the way. Yet, if men were perfect, there'd be no need for a savior. As sinful humans, our only recourse is to continually recognize that God is King and Lord over our lives, in everything we are to please and honor Him. Yet, because we are fallen creatures who constantly sin, we are to daily seek repentance and a deeper relationship with God. By His mercy we are saved; by His grace we bring Him honor.