The Free

     I just got back from spending a week in the great outdoors. I was a camp councilor at my church's summer camp. I've been doing this for the past three years and this summer was BY FAR the best I've ever had. Not that the other summers were bad, mind you, but this summer I felt as though the messages were ministering to me specifically. The group I was leading was amazing also! I had seven beautiful girls who were about to enter their senior year of high school -- I've never seen girls so on fire for Jesus Christ and seeking His will above their own!


     The theme this year was: THE FREE. The pastors were specifically referring to freedom from sin -- the freedom one receives from Jesus Christ when one becomes saved. Since I and my girls were already saved, THE FREE took on a different meaning for us...

     For me, it was freedom from fear. I have spent my life in fear; not a whimpering, trembling fear that refuses to go outdoors or to experience the new, but a fear of failure and a fear of rejection. This fear manifests as a refusal to do something that I feel will make people laugh at my inabilities or criticize my attempts. This fear also makes meeting new people difficult and talking about serious issues with old friends impossible -- the fear of being abandoned or rejected for something I might say was too strong.

     These fears can be overwhelming at times and although a healthy amount of daring and sensitivity towards others is VERY good, these were to an extreme. I was scared and miserable because I felt weak, helpless and alone.

     But Christ showed me otherwise.

     I always knew:

"Blessed are those who have been persecuted for the sake of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you and persecute you, and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of Me" (Matthew 5:10-11, NASB).

and

"If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you" (John 15:18-19, NASB).

     Yet, I never really lived it. Now, I have learned...
 
     I learned that Christ is where all my approval must lie. He is in charge of my destiny. He has given me gifts to use for His glory. He has designed me with a plan and a purpose -- to usher in brothers and sisters to the Faith through my words and actions, even if I have no idea I'm doing it. If I feel God calling me to do something, I can stand in confidence that He will provide the strength and ability to do it with excellence when I know of myself it is impossible.

     God was big enough and smart enough to create the universe from nothing. He was powerful enough to divide the sea, to make the sun stand still, to make hearts strong enough to move blood through our veins. He was loving enough to die for the sins of the universe. There is no problem -- no mistake -- so large that we cannot overcome it with His help.

     I can stand strong. I can laugh in the face of the world when it tries to pull me down! I can do that which seems impossible because it is not me but Christ in me. He is my strength! He is my power because, of myself, I am nothing, but with Him I am everything.